I have this really bad habit of taking a lot of things on and getting stressed when I can’t do it all. It’s also hard for me to ask for help. I take on a lot because I hate feeling like I may miss out on something – this goes for school, work, and social activities. Any advice on how I can keep from being in over my head while still doing things I love?
Dear Overwhelmed Olivia,
FOMO is real but so is exhaustion. Missing out on things happening around you may seem like a really big deal, but the cost of doing everything is missing out on yourself. It can be more rewarding sometimes to sleep in or take yourself to a movie than having to spend time doing things you do not want – it is just rewarding in a different way. Everyone loves those busy times where it feels like your week is action-packed, but maybe try to limit yourself for one or two extra things a week. Be realistic with your time management and know that if you go out with friends on one night instead of two, you can shift that time to one thing you picked up for work. Once you reach your weekly limit, just simply tell people you’re busy because you actually are. It is not an excuse, it is a fact. In regards to asking for help, reframe it as delegating and developing your skills in managing. If you take on being in charge for a work event or running a club at school, asking people to help you is what a good leader does. Not only does it take some stress off of you, but it also gives others the chance to do something with you. If it comes down to trust issues, realize that while some people may do things differently it does not mean they are wrong. Lastly, if something still stresses you out constantly even if you ask for help or allot time to do it properly, I think you might not love it as much as you do.
New York City is so expensive for a college student like me. Do you have any financial tips on how to save money?
Dear Broke Bess,
New York City is a place where money can easily get drained from your bank account! It’s also hard as a full-time college student to have the time to work on top of everything else you have to do. Personally, I work almost full time in retail and it can still be hard to save money. If you do have any time, I encourage you to get a job/increase your hours. It’s better to work more and have money left over than working less and struggling. Another tip to save money is to grocery shop smart. Always write a list beforehand and do not buy foods that you will have to force yourself to like. This way you’re not picking up just anything in sight or letting any food go to waste along with your money. Another is to try not to use apps like Uber or Seamless. If you have a metrocard, use it. Especially as it gets warmer, walking some extra blocks and leaving earlier is not a huge deal. You can also spend the time commuting to be productive by doing something like reading a book! If you do end up getting takeout, order ahead and pick it up yourself. Some places have super high delivery fees or minimums. Again, you’ll get some extra steps in and be able to eat out without throwing dollars away.
Need advice? Send in questions to Megan at firstname.lastname@example.org.