By Cassandra Gagnon
So you messed up 2017, who didn’t? Next year, be more prepared. For the partner you plan on marrying, the one you just got past screwing with, for your best friend, your kind of friend who you should probably get a gift because your mutual friend is too, and most importantly yourself, there is a Valentine’s Day gift out there. For her/him lists are a bit outdated for my taste, both you and they know where they fall on the gender spectrum, so at your own discretion, here is a list of the ~Top 10~ gifts any person would be more than thrilled to receive.
1) Any of the Maison Margiela REPLICA perfume/cologne scents (My favorites include Jazz Club, which I wear, Beachwalk, Flower Market, Promenade in the Garden, and At the Barber.) While some of them are labeled male and female fragrances, my personal scent happens to be a male orientated one, and their more expensive Replica: Fantasies line is gender anonymous. Each go for $125 at Sephora, and a few of the scents come in luxurious candles too.
2) It wouldn’t be a romantic time without a Lush body product, and with their current Valentine’s campaign featuring gay couples, it’s a brand I can get behind. For bath bombs I recommend Sex Queen, and “Aphrodisiac jasmine soak”, or Titsy Totsy, a heart shaped rose petal filled number. As for a more unexpected product, try their new Love Spell massage bar, made of organic cocoa butter and scented with carnation and neroli. A partner rub down is suggested.
3) Now speaking of the sexual, the first of two not so subtle gifts starts with the Vesper Vibrator Necklace from Crave. Yes a vibrator necklace. A slim, silent vibrator with four speeds, easily washed and charged, hanging on a chain. Now don’t think it’s some tacky obviously phallic shaped piece of rubber on a string, the design is a short and sleek rod looking deal on a delicate necklace chain, available in silver, gold, and rose gold, for under $70. The best part? You can customize it with a cheeky personal message inscribed on the side.
4) The second more brash gift is a service I didn’t know existed until last semester. We all know Birchbox or the Sephora Play Box, monthly subscription boxes with samples and products galore. But what if instead those boxes included, say, water resistant lube and a vibrator hidden as a rubber duckie for shower sex? The Unbound subscription box offers exactly that. If that’s pushing it for you, there’s also a Galentine’s Day box, a tampon and period box, and even a menopause box. All for you, your partner, your friends, etc to enjoy.
5) On a more romantic side, heart shaped jewelry can be hard to buy, especially for the fashion crowd that doesn’t want your pink cubic zirconia heart shaped pendant. As sweet as we may all find it, and be thankful, that does not mean we are wearing it to our internships at Marchesa, Nylon, etc. Try these Marc Jacobs heart stud earrings instead. Vintage treated gold with a pearl in the middle make it fashionable and interesting, the name adds some credit to broke students, the heart keeps it romantic, and the $60 price tag doesn’t cause you two to break up.
6) Or if you think you possess the sense of irony or love for Sylvia Plath enough to pull it off, try a pendant with an anatomically correct heart, for the skeptical realist in you. Perfect for your friend you always call cold hearted, or for your partner with a sense of dark humor and love of Poe, they’re a cheap option available on just about every quirky Etsy shop you could find, and come in a range of metals and delicateness. My recommendation is to go for the smaller, daintier ones, at risk of looking like you got it at Hot Topic past it’s late 90’s early 2000’s “cool” era.
7) The next thing is literally any of the lingerie sold online by For Love and Lemons. Seasonally and personally speaking, the current standouts are the Petunia and Primrose bra and pantie sets. Gorgeous red matching sets with lace and heart appliques that still maintain an easy sex appeal, plus the perfect amount of kitsch, and it’s equal parts appropriate for the day and the gift that keeps on giving. Photo shoot and bedroom ready. Plus let’s face it, it’s the next best thing after the Saint Laurent fur red heart coat.
8) Champagne is for weddings, celebrations, and setting the mood. And your Valentine deserves nothing less than Blair Waldorf approved Dom Perignon. From their classic P2, to their Vintage and Rose, there are distributors of the luxe booze all over the city so while the bill might be high, the effort won’t have to be.
9) If you’re the type to pop the question on Valentine’s Day, you better make sure the engagement ring is extra special. Anna Sheffield is a favorite among many, and with it’s wide range of classic cuts but interesting details, it’s perfect for your non so ordinary other. The brand offers both engagement rings and men’s bands, offering style to whoever gets the ask.
10) We’ve got booze, lingerie, sex toys, more sex toys, bath products, jewelry, and perfume. The only thing left? Flowers of course. And for the fashion crowd and special someone’s alike, it has to be from Putnam and Putnam. With large arrangements, and smaller vases with their candles too, they deliver around New York City with a personalized note. These aren’t your gas station single stemmed roses, and it shows.
Better luck next year, 2019 is all on you.